The Appalachian Trail is not in South America

After a week of changing stories and snarky speculations, it's been revealed that South Carolina governor Mark Sanford was on a cruise in South America. After a tough fight with his legislature, the governor took off during Father's Day weekend to another country and decompress.

"Sanford, in an exclusive interview with The State Media Company, said he decided at the lasy minute to go to the South American country to recharge after a difficult legislative session in which he battled with lawmakers over how to spend federal stimulus money. Sanford said he had considered hiking on the Appalachian Trail, an activity he said he has enjoyed since he was a high school student. "But I said no, I wanted to do something exotic," Sanford said. "...It's a great city.""

Sanford also says he doesn't know "how this thing go blown out of proportion," and that he simply needed to "get out of the bubble I'm in." So...why didn't anyone--including his wife and children--seem to know where he really was? Who paid for his plane tickets and lodging? And was he alone? Why was he gone for a week? If anyone knew where he really was, why aren't they talking? And--last but certainly not least--why in the fresh hell does he not think this is a big deal?

Something tells me this is just the beginning of a long and weird story. Sanford might be on some Britney-Spears-before-her-conservatorship-type shit.